So far...

As a way of documenting where we are in our journey and to sort of set a starting place, I thought it would be helpful to share some of the logistics of our IVF journey so far.

In April 2011, we started exploring IVF with CCRM and a local provider. Our local provider suggested that our odds of a healthy successful pregnancy were the same with IVF as they were with us just trying, so they said that we should just keep trying and not waste our money chasing an IVF baby. After looking at their statistics and those of the general population for our age (b: 37, me: 40) group, we could see that she was right. The odds for most IVF clinics in our area are pretty low- as are the odds for women in my age group. We didn't like that answer but appreciated her honesty. We did have a series of blood tests, genetic tests and physical tests to determine if there were any contributing factors on that end. There weren't.

At the same time, we researched genetic testing and IVF for women over 40 to see if there were any outliers- were there any clinics that were more successful with this age group? Yes, CCRM came up as one of the few clinics that was working on, and managed to find better odds for couples facing advanced maternal age (AMA as it's affectionately called).

In the spring, we also attended an adoption orientation with an agency in our area. It was interesting, as the couple that was their showcase couple to answer questions was philosophically in the exact opposite camp as the agency was in terms of their position on open adoptions.

August 2011, we contacted CCRM to let them know that we were interested in having a phone consultation and exploring our options with them. About two weeks later, we had our 1/2 hour chat with Dr. Schoolcraft on the phone. He seemed gentle, quiet, straightforward, and helpful in answering every single question I had. They said to call back on Day 1 of my next period to set up the one day work up (ODWU), which is a full day of testing at their clinic.

Mid September 2011, I called them to set up an appointment for our ODWU. We had to purchase tickets to fly into town for both of us, so we asked for a Monday or Friday appointment, which they were able to accommodate.

Ten days later, we were in Colorado, getting pulled, poked and probed to make sure that they had all the information they needed to determine what our challenges were and so that we could address them. I'd recommend checking out AuntieEm's awesome blog (http://ccrmjourney.wordpress.com/) for a great tour of their facility.

The plan is below. We did get off track for some of the appointments, which they said was fine, so long as it wasn't when we were to meet with the doctor- we had to be on time for that meeting. Since there are times when partners can't be present, and just so it's clear which times he could be there and which times he wasn't allowed, I've noted when B was present.

7:30AM: Orientation with two other couples and a single woman led by a nurse. It was pretty straight forward: here's who we are, what we do, what the process is, don't read blogs (haha!), your cycle will be your own, the nurses are available these hours and at this number, etc. B was there with me after he finished his donation to the cause.

8:30: Baseline doppler and ultrasound. (B was there.) I've had a follicular count done before, but this sonographer was amazing; she explained everything she was doing, what she saw, and helped us to see what she was talking about. We found out that I have 10 follicles on the left and 8 on the right! Plus, I have two extra-ovular (outside of the ovaries) cysts, which she said were absolutely normal and nothing to be concerned about. She also used the doppler to measure the blood flow on each side. They recommend NO CAFFEINE for 72 hours before this test. I had a small bit of chocolate the night before and it showed. I was on the border for not having good blood flow on one side. (WOW, that's sensitive!!) And, what if you have bad blood flow? They send you to an acupuncturist to get things moving, then you have to delay a month, so this is crucial. The sonographer was very friendly and kind. Recommendation moving forward: NO caffeine. Seriously. Not even a little bit. Seriously, I mean it.

9:00: Consent forms with the Fertility Labs of Colorado (FLC). FLC is the company that CCRM makes you do all your blood work through. The consent part was fine, we decided not to participate in their research studies, as the specific projects are not defined in the consents and because it's a private for-profit corporation, with no direct public good. (We both had to sign consent forms).

9:45: Hysteroscopy with Dr. Schoolcraft. B wasn't allowed in the room. Per typical doctor's appointments, I waited for what seemed like 15 minutes for him once I got in the room and stripped down. When Dr. S. walked in, I joked that at least we've talked on the phone, so we've sort of met before...he sort of chuckled and got down to business. He and the nurse asked me questions about my work and life to distract me from what was a nearly completely painless and very quick procedure.

10:00: Regroup with Dr. S. (B was brought in.) This is the meeting where he talks about what's possible, what's not, and we assess going forward. He said that from all the information he had, it looked like we were a pretty promising couple. I did have one place of irregularity in my uterus that he'd avoid during implantation, but overall, things looked good. Because I had FSH tests from my previous clinic, he said that the nurse could come up with a draft of our calendar after getting our AMH test results and that we should have a calendar by the end of the next week.

10:30: IVF consult with Nurse. We met our primary nurse contact at this time. She was very helpful and answered all of our questions with compassion. This being our very first experience with IVF, we expected to have a bit more explanation about the big picture in terms of the process and timing of everything as well as a demonstration of the shots, but we got a video, which you can view on their website. Because we were opting for the CCS, we had to watch a poorly produced video on that procedure. She told us the estimated costs- we're coming in at about $40k including the testing and all of the trips. For some perspective- international adoption is about as much, depending on the country.

12-1:00: Lunch- there's a little strip mall right up the street from CCRM that has two decent restaurants for a quick lunch. We brought our consent forms from earlier in the day to read over and sign while we ate.

1:00: Blood tests: This is where we ran into some trouble with the FLC lab. When we got there, we had to check the labels and make sure that our name and birth date was correct. We appreciated them checking. However, when it came time for the blood draw, the flabotomist took three times to get my vein! Perhaps the worst part was her squirreling around once she got the needle in, not just a poke and thank you very much. Thank goodness there was another lab tech passing through, as she was the one that eventually got the needle where it needed to be. Then, came the rather large ~$3,000 bill for the various tests. We paid, but got a call the following Monday that the computer was off, so it didn't go through and had to pay again.

1:30: Business office: We paid our $1,000 deposit for IVF and off we went...

Fast forward to the end of the next week, when we are supposed to get our draft calendar...we emailed on Thursday, hoping to hear from someone because I had my family doc appointment and wanted to be sure that I had a list of further tests that I needed (annual physical, pap test, mammogram, vitamin d, etc.). I also wanted to know if they got our test results back, what they were, and if we would be getting our draft calendar. (We literally had no idea what the time line looks like, so anything would have been helpful here). I got a reply that our primary nurse was away but would reply tomorrow.

Then, we emailed on Friday and they said that our primary nurse was out again. I emailed back that I didn't necessarily need it from my primary nurse, we'd take a calendar and results from anyone. Then, when I didn't hear back by 4pm (their time), I called to follow up. (I thought the office closed at 4:30 on Fridays and didn't want to miss anyone.) Now, you might think I'm being freakish about this calendar thing, and maybe I am--a bit. But, we're planning a move and flights to get me to my sweetie to help him drive...so we kind of need some dates. Well, the nurse said that there was nothing in my chart about dates, that the primary nurse would be out until Monday and the doctor would be gone until Tuesday.

So, no calendar until next week. Which means more costs because the prices will go up now that We're less than a week away from the trip. This is definitely a challenge. If the doc hadn't told us that we could expect a calendar, if he'd said in two weeks, or even three- we'd know to plan for that. If they gave us a general guideline for when we might need to be available for various appointments, we could plan that. But now, we are stuck without a plan and increased costs for an already outrageously expensive procedure.

So far, mixed impressions.